Physics jokes
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?
Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.
Where was Stephen Hawking during the house fire?
The top of the stairs.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
Why did Steven Hawkins die?
Because he got a virus.
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far from the wall. The cord unplugged.
Did you ever walk into Steve Hawking's house?
"No."
He hasn't too.
"Wheel" all miss him, right?
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
I’m reading a book about Anti-Gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity, it's impossible to PUT DOWN!
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
I once read a book on antigravity, it was impossible to put down.
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding!
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up literally everything.
A man was at the temperature -273.15°C. He was OK.