Physicist jokes
What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?
Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."
1 "Knock knock."
2 "Who's there?"
1 "Interrupting physicist."
2 "Interrupting who?"
1 "Muon!!!"
Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?
Because he's British.
When does Stephen Hawking cross the road?
When it says "DON'T WALK."
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.
How did Stephen Hawking make it up the stairway to heaven?
Well, he didn’t; they invented an elevator.
Why was Stephen Hawking known as lazy?
Because he was always sitting on the job.
What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?
Stephen Hawking.
Yes, Stephen Hawking is alive.
YEET!
What did Stephen Hawking get for his B-Day?
Chocolate arm.
Stephen Hawking had a heart attack the year before his death.
They took him to PC World for repairs.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on a bungy jump?
Spasticelastic.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite type of basketball?
Dribble.
Why is Stephen Hawking in hell?
He couldn't get his wheelchair up the stairway to heaven.
I bet Steven Hawking $100 if he could catch me.
As soon as he said yes, I climbed up the stairs.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking has ever watched Avengers: Endgame... Oh wait, he can't.
What do you call Stephen Hawking in a burning building?
Hot Wheels.
When Stephen Hawking's teacher asked him, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
He said, "Six foot four."
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite hobby?
Rolling on ice.
When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.
He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"