Perspective jokes

How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.

I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣

My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.

Then I asked him how many years ago.

He replied with, "When were you born?"

Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors?

Because you can’t look up to them.

I'm not completely useless; I can be used as a bad example.

Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.

A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...

Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???

Child: Both.

Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?

Because they are really committed to their cause.

A friend texts to another:

"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"

The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"

To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."

A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone that knows you.

Sometimes when I think I'm ugly, I just think of my sister and it makes me feel better.

My therapist said to try having a different outlook on life.

I agree. I should have a different outlook on life. Preferably from underground.

A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.

It's always the little things that make us laugh.

The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.

An optimist says, "The glass is half full."

A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."

A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."

Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"

Yo mama so fat, I couldn't see the store.

Look at the bright side!

The worst is behind us.

Why did the midget laugh when he ran? Because the grass tickles his balls.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

I’m trying to see things from LEO’S perspective... but I just can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.