Personal jokes
What do you call a black person in a dark room?
Invisible.
Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.
What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?
Rainbow Road.
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
Yo mama so fat, she doesn't count as 1 person bro, she counts as 40 people.
What's the difference between a dog from an Asian person and a cat from an Asian person?
Only the taste.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
What do you call a person who measures air? Airometer.
What do you call a fat Chinese person that talks way too much? Panda Express.
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
What do you say to a depressed person on the ceiling?
Hang in there!