Person jokes
Looks like he got stuck in a sticky situation.
1st person: What do you call a blind pianist?
2nd person: What?
1st person: A pianist.
Taylor.
If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?
How do you help a constipated person?
You scare the shit out of them!
What did the Indian person say to the lady?
"Curry up, will you?"
Me nan.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
Person: "Doctor, doctor, I've only got 50 seconds to live!"
Doctor: "Just give me a minute!"
Why do you want me?
Cus u like me...
What do you mean?
You love me.
No.
Look down.
Callum Coulter
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
How do you know if an Asian has been in your house?
Your dog's gone.
Your finances are done.
And your floaties.
When someone falls, you say to them, "I remember when I started to learn to walk."
Me: Hi Jaiden.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.
Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*
Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.
FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!
Person 1 says to Person 2: "I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith."
So Person 2 says to Person 1: "What's the name of his other leg?"
You: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Random person: Why?
You: To get to the idiot's house!
Random person: What?
You: Knock knock.
Random person: Who's there?
You: The chicken.
What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?
A gay guy that’s straight!
Chuck Norris hasn’t decided yet when Jimmy Hoffa can come out.
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.