People jokes
Guys, don’t let nobody hurt you with words.
Like someone once said, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
What do depressed people use for emotions online?
They use EMOjis.
:/
What do the films The Sixth Sense and Titanic have in common?
Icy dead people.
The ones you hate most are also the ones who are by your side most.
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
Two old people sitting on a bench. One turns to the other and says, "My butt fell asleep." The other says, "Yep, I heard it snore a couple of times."
Michael Jackson and Kelly Clarkson both did shady stuff to children. Michael Jackson said that there is nothing wrong with sharing a bed with unrelated small children. Kelly Clarkson said that there is nothing wrong with physically beating a small child.
The thing is, though, only one of them made "Billie Jean" or "Beat It", and the other is just a typical karaoke country singer. So no surprise people gave Wacko Jacko a pass.
Where do you buy a dishwasher?
Hot singles in your area.
What type of people think rape jokes are funny?
Only the coolest people in the world! I fucking love you guys 😂
What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill? An avalanche.
What about Mexicans you may ask? A mudslide.
What about black people running down a hill?? A jailbreak.
Surely people would consider putting pedals on wheelchairs so that their arms don't get tired.
People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."
Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa.
Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.
why are people in japan so slim? because the last time a fatman came, they lost half their population.
What kind of exercise do lazy people do?
Diddly-squats.
My advice to suicidal people: just hang in there. 🕺