Pee Jokes

Me:Spell icup My Friend:i see you pee Me: BOII YOU BETTER GIVE MEH SOME PRIVACY IN MY BATH ROOM!!!! My Friend:Oh hehe O-O

Two Italian men get on a bus...

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. They speak with an Italian accent.

The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first.

Den I come.

Den two asses come together.

I come once-a-more.

Two asses, they come together again.

I come again and pee twice.

Then I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.

"In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man.

"Who talkin' abouta sexa?

I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."

Do trees pee?

How else do we have No.1 pencils? 🤔

My entire family “TAKE THIS GIRL TO AN ASYLUM!!!” Me “OH NO” 💀

Three nuns had to go before mother Superior. The first one goes up to her and she says have you sinned? Yes I have mother I have stolen a bicycle. Okay said mother Superior okay said mother Superior say 100 holy Marys and put dip your hand in the holy water... Up comes nun number two and she says she has sinned she slept with a married man.. so mother Superior says okay save 500 hail Marys and dip your hand in the holy water and go on your way the third nun comes up and she says I peed in the holy water 🤣😂🤣😂😁😁🌈

What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song?

Beat It

Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the worlds hardest riddle! Good luck 😝- “I turn polar bears white and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid and normal people look like celebrities.”

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Where does the Batman go to pee? The Batroom

Hey dude can you speel ihop. Sure man. I H O P. Wait you ate my pee!!!

OK son", he says. It's as easy as counting to 5.

1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.

From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4".

One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. The next 3 nights the same thing happened and finally i decided i had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up I went into my parents room and woke my mom up and said, "you have to come with me and see this it's really important," Half asleep she murmured, "oh what is it can't it wait until the morning?' I pleaded, "no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "oh so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."

Bill? Bill?" bill hears faintly in the distance. Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.

Why Can't you hear the Pteradactyle go to the bathroom Because its pee is silent

the pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed. when I was in the shower, i couldn't hear it. Why? because the "p" is silent

I got caught peeing in the pool

The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in

There were 3 guys in detetenion called zip willy pee and they were all being naughty the teacher came in and said zip down willy out pee in the corner

troll your friend by saying i and saying cup and then tell them that that means i see you pee LOL there is also lettuce cup witch means let us see you pee