Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She tort them all to pull out on time.
What dose a peice of gum and a gun have in common
You pull one out everyone wants to be your friend
Guys we gotta stop telling these jokes they are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue
Yo daddy so stupid he threw a father’s day party at the orphanage
What did the catholic priest say to the other catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? Out of a catalogue 😁
Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great either
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: Do you have chocolate filled ice cream? The man replies: We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one? Johnny replies: Sure. After that the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later the man comes with a ice cream and Johnny's phone. Johnny asks: How much for the ice cream? The man replies: Nothing, its on the house. After Johnny ate hes delicious ice cream, he searched for hes watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
What do you call two emos spending time together? Hanging out.
what did one emo say to another emo... rock it out
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents? They cry... They scream.. with joy "Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents" Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didnt live to tell the tail...
I rate my dad as pilot 9 out of 11
Bro, I love hanging out with bullies. It's either we play Yahtzee or we playing Nazi.
the biggest inconvenience in 2001 i thought was my brother turns out it was 9/11 i guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was aluh aluckbar
I found alien in my backyard I put him to work. He went to farm never seen him again moments later he is on daily planet acting as reporter a green rock smashed my house. I called him back he passed out.
I remarked you lazy
What did nemo say to the emo.
Be careful you cant nemo your way out of emo
I can't tell whats farther the great wall of China or how far Paul Walker flew out his windshield
What did one candle say to the other? Want to go out tonight?
How does a tree access the internet? By logging in and branching out!
'...This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word "PEDO" that had been spray-painted on his front window.
"What's been going on John?"' I asked.
"Fucking kids," came his mumbled reply.
The dirty bastard!'
Some locked me out of my house today.... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore
I’ve got money and suicidal thoughts, and I’m all out of money
