A pedophile is chatting on the internet : “On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?”

me and my friend were roasting each other she : you look like a reese’s cup me:your so old your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray

Yo mama so old the carpenter uses her crotch as sandpaper.

What did the plate say to the other plate ?? Lunch is on me😂😂

What do you call a 100-year-old frog? An old croak!

Max likes his girls like he likes his wine. 7 years old and locked in his basement.

I was working at the bank today when an old lady came up to me and asked me to check her balance.

So I pushed her over.

Yo mama’s so old when she was a girl rainbows were black and white

What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid?

One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.

a dark joke is like a kid with cancer. it never gets old. I AM SO SORRY

Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone.

But when she bent over, Rover took over, and gave her a bone of his own

A rapist walks into a school and asks if they had 5 year olds in the school and the teacher replies “are you that same person who took Jimmy?” the man replies “yes” and the teacher says “Take susie too she’s being a little bitch.”

What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6 year olds?

I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage

I like my women like I like my wine, twelves Year’s old, in the basement, and locked up

What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus? They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”

Your mom is so old she turned to dust before Thanos snapped.

When I go to weddings old people will tell me I’m next but when I go to funerals I tell old people they’re next.

Mom: you need to grow up. your so immature

Me: glares get out of my castle …

Mom: it’s a pillow fort

Me: why cant i have an imagination!?

Mom: your almost 19 years old

Me: not good enough … OUT!

What’s the best part about banging twenty eight year olds? There are twenty of them

So I was f**g this bh right, and I thought I had aides. So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get aides. Now what I’m wondering is where the hell does an eight year old get aides?! I guess my sister needs new friends…