Octopus

Octopus jokes

Spider

God: ok, what if I made an evil land octopus that could walk on walls?

Pet

I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.

Oh, don't worry, he's okay now.

But the vet charged me six quid.

Time

How many times do you tickle an octopus to get it to laugh?

Ten-tickles!

Difference

What is the difference between a white octopus and a white squid?

A white octopus isn't in the KKK!

Hat

What do you call an octopus with a hat?

An octopus with a hat, of course.

Purse

What do you call 2 octopuses that look the same? Identical!

Where does an octopus put its money? In an octo-purse!

Child

What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?

The Jackson 4.

Emo

Emo

Did you hear about the octopus who went emo? He sliced all 8 of his wrists.

Mama

Yo mama so stupid, she joined the Squid Game as a sea life lover because she thought it was a game of whoever catches the most octopuses wins.