Invertebrate jokes
What card is the slowest and slimiest?
Ace-nail.
My aunt's star sign was Cancer, so it's pretty ironic how she died...
She was eaten by a giant crab.
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
What is the difference between a white octopus and a white squid?
A white octopus isn't in the KKK!
What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!
What do you call finding half of a worm?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh moan for me.
What do you call a snail without a shell?
Dead.
What’s the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail—it’ll be delighted!
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
What is a gathering of octopuses called?
Octoposse.
Hi, everyone. Serious question. Would it be illegal to decapitate a worm? Asking for a friend, he's so worried we're going to jail. I'm not. I'm fine. Please reply fast.
Octopus.
I eat cockroaches.
Maggot.
Who is the king of the insects 🐜?
The Monarch!
How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
Tentacles!
What does your mother look like after I had sex with her eight times? An octopus.
Why do women have legs? Because they would leave snail tracks wherever they went.
"Octo" means 8 and an octopus has 8 legs... so where did the "pus" come from?