Nothing

Nothing jokes

Angel

My mom's name is Angel, and she is nothing like one!

Especially in bed...

Lady

There's an old lady doing gardening every year. Nothing grows. She goes to the man who lives next door. She says, "How do you get your tomatoes so big and red?" He tells her, "You show them your privates at night time." So she leaves. That night later, she goes outside and shows the garden her privates. The next day she's got zucchinis a meter long!

Autism

What does a kid who has autism and reading have in common?

Absolutely nothing.

Fork

What did the fork say to the spoon?

Nothing, forks don’t speak, silly!

Memes

Sheep

Llama: Hey sheep, let's play cards.

Sheep: Llama, fuck off!!

Llama: What's your damn problem?

Sheep: Nothing, I'm just having a Baahd day, okay dick head?

Prince

Gwen: Prince, they told me you'd be crying back. What do you want?

Prince: Nothing...BUT CAN WE GET BACK TOGETHER!?!??

Gwen: Sorry...BUT...I have a life to live now. I'm logging off this site and going to watch some TV. I'll be back in 1 hour, but we are done...DONE...DONE.

Man

Why did people say a man had nothing? ... Because he was a-nonymous.

Bird

Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?

There's nothing worth shitting on.

Life

Person: Hey, do you know what's the best thing in life?

...

You do realize that I said nothing, right?

Me: Exactly :)

Ocean

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing, it just waved. This was the worst joke ever.

Fam

Me: It smells like good fam.

Friend: What's good fam?

Me: Nothing much, what about you fam?

Donkey

What does the donkey say to the other donkey?:

Nothing, donkeys don't talk.

Whale

What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?

Absolutely nothing.

Nothing

Mom clean your room Me no it’s my room and I don’t want to clean it Mom you are nothing like Mrs. Smith’s daughter me Well I’m not Mrs. Smith’s daughter now am I you are the Worst like why are you trying to compare me with Mrs. Smith’s daughter I’m not her OK I am not her so stop Mom do you know what I pushed you out of my hula 43 minutes do not make me hate you because guess what I brought you into the world and I can take you out of it Me bro