Not jokes
What animal can not be trusted?
A lion 🦁.
It's illegal to go onto someone's property, demand money that they might not have while wearing all black, and threaten horrible things if they don't pay.
But when the IRS does it, it's perfectly fine. HMMMMM . . .
Um, please do not swear, there is no need. Could you maybe just find clean jokes?
I really want to beat the living daylights out of you, but it's not worth getting the wooden spoon for garbage.
I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.
Pro marriage tip: Let your wife know you’re all about women’s rights. There’s no reason she needs to talk that much; it’s not like replying to her is voice activated.
Why do orphans not know how to spell?
Because no one likes them, dumb people. 🤭🤡
What did God say to the black person?
"Oops, I burned one."😳
Not racist, just funny.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
Pro lifers: End abortion!!!
Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.
Does it make me gay if I kiss your dad and he decides to drill my ass?
What is a dog that does not walk? A magic dog.
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
Windows could not connect to the Internet, would you like to search online for a solution to this problem?
Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?
Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.
Stop with the 9/11 jokes, people. They're just not gonna fly.
Why can't orphans get 5 stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.
Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.