Not jokes

Why are orphans always sad?

Because their parents aren't there to cheer them up.

Boyfriend: "Babe, are you traffic police?"

Girlfriend: "No."

Boyfriend: "Then why do you shout at me for not wearing a helmet?"

I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.

What makes a cult and a racist family of 5 common?

Not all are friends.

Knock, knock.

Orphan: Who's there?

Not your parents!

Why do orphans not buy a keyboard? Because they can’t use the home button.

Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.

Do not ever make fun of people who look like they have no necks. They are fully protected from vampires.

How do you find out if your kid is gay?

Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.

I'm not transphobic. I just want transparency...

When is a cold not a cold?

Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."

Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.

Twinkle, twinkle, there’s a car Coming like a shooting star.

I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.

Dark humor is like life:

Not everyone gets it.

Please write your comment.

But do not use words like monkey, donkey, loser, etc.

What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?

Not wanted.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Not your.

Not your who?

Not your mama!

Yo mama so fat Trump built a wall around her and not the border.

What does Jeffrey tell his white teens?

You want to take it orally or through anal? Joke, I'm not asking.