Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the cowboy die with his boots on??
He didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked da bucket 😂🤣👌🏻👌🏻.. knee slapper
Three guys are on a plane: one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American. The pilot says, "There is too much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off." So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said, "I have plenty of these where I come from." Then the Asian threw out some rice and said, "I have plenty of these in my country." The American threw out a bomb and said, "I have a lot of these in my country."
The plane crashes anyway, and the three men start to walk away from the crash. As they were walking, they found a boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of burritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy." The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of rice fell out of the sky and shredded all my clothes." The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble. They kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny. The boy said, "MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!"
What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Dam.
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
Why did the shark fisherman stop at the abortion clinic?
Because dead babies make the best chum! :)
What do you call a Navajo with a lot of cash?
Johnny Cash.
Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.
Why did God create gay men? So fat girls could dance.
Sayo-nara.
What’s the most common name for cancer patients?
Luke (leukemia)
I asked my rigger buddy if he could tie me up later, he said, "I'm a frayed knot."
How do you finger a feminist? Shake her hand and call her Theresa.
Two guys are on the playground. One guy says to the other, "Did you know that Hellen Keller had a playground in her backyard?" The other guy said, "No." The first guy says, "Neither did she."
All jokes are funny with the correct delivery. Except for abortion jokes, there is no delivery.
Why can't Cleopatra ride a bicycle?
Because she's dead.
I bet you go grocery shopping at the Twinkie Factory.
You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?
If I called you gay, you would probably hit me with your purse.
I bet you love prostate exams because you live things up your ass.
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? "You're too young to smoke."