Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
I told my friend an egg joke yesterday.
He thought it was eggcellent.
Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind, too.
Taig
As a doctor myself, that nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “Whatever you wish for comes true once you slide down.” One kid stepped up and slid down. He wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river.
The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money. He then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee!”
Random guy: "Go suck a D*ck!"
Me: Nah, I'd rather suck a 9mm.
You’ll parsley believe how many puns I have. Hopefully your funny-bone isn’t broken because these are real rib-ticklers.
Where did the cows go to a date?
To the moo-vies!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to KFC.
He's homeless.
Another: Oh he must be A "Sheer" (as in Andrew Scheer) survivor...
The other: No, he's a Liberal (as in Justin Trudeau) job hopeful.
I was pretty tight friends with my butt plug. But then we had a falling-out.
Female Rights?
What do you call it when a lizard can’t get a boner?
Ereptile Dysfunction!
What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup?
A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴
Prankster kid: Knock knock.
Neighbor: Who's there?
...
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
So, three guys are walking carefully into a bar.
The bartender said, "What can I get you, gentlemen?"
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
"I'm lagging."