New Jokes - Page 1998 - Worst Jokes Ever

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Sally.

Sally who?

You're going to bed right now.

"Dick, you're fired."

"I'd buy that for a dollar."

What game hurts you the more stages you survive?

Cancer.

What did the stop sign say to the street sign when he couldn't read a map?

"Can you give me some pointers?"

A retard walks into a bar.

Bartender: Hey, retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard!

Thank you for listening to joke, sincerely - Jokeman87848584

if an atom makes up everything im still suprised how it made ur mom

How come when women decide to kill their unborn baby it's a "choice"? But when I decide to drive my car into a playground full of children it's called "murder."

"Stupid ass baby."

DEEZ NUTS!

Donald Trump is, like, really orange.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Hoyt is gay.

Fat Lever.

A guy was annoyed in a store. I walk up to him and said, "What's wrong, buddy? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned isle!"

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite snake?

Microchips.

A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.

A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.