Worst Jokes Ever

All trucks are monster trucks if you’re afraid of trucks.

What does a butt do when it is angry?

Butt crack!

Cereal.

I'm the joke, bitch.

Where do you think all the orphans went?

In the World Trade Center, I trapped them in so they can finally get to their parents.

Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.

What do you call a cow that sleeps?

A bulldozer! 🐄💤

What do you say to a clock?

"What time is it?"

Angel: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?

Satan: Could you like FUCK OFF FOR ONE MINUTE?

A man goes into heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa's clock, it has never moved because she has never lied." "There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."

What is Helen Keller's favorite color?

Velcro.

Sean's hairline recedes faster than my grades.

My car fell in a ditch today. Didn't want any more cars falling, so I put a car-pet over it.

What does the Fox say?

Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow.

What's a gay guy should be scared of?

A straight gay!

What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?

A gay guy that’s straight!

Habit.

Me and my mom order Chinese food. So when it came, my mom grabbed the egg roll and started to suck it down. Then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom says, "I love you for 5 dollar."

You big gay.

What dog can’t see a dog that’s blind?