Gf: "You are a drug."
Bf: "Why, cause you are addicted to me?"
Gf: "No, because you are number one most wanted in Montana."
What is an orphan's least favorite movie? Home.
Just to get things straight, I'm NOT, I repeat, NOT racist, but this joke goes out to all the people who talk about other people with darker skin than the other person.
Bully: Your skin is so black and ugly (for the 5th time).
Me: I'm so happy you love my skin color!
Bully: Ew, no I don't!
Me: Then why do you keep talking about it?
You wanna know why I love trains?
They end my suffering.
Why do they call them apartments when they are together?
What is a bald eagle's favorite dog breed?
A beagle!
What is a bald eagle's favorite chip?
Preagles!
I went to the bank to apply for a Personal Loan.
Then they found out I wanted to be a rapper, so they didn't want to Post M"loan."
What do squirrels and men have in common?
They always want a nut.
I named my iPod "Titanic." It's syncing now.
what’s the hardest thing to eat on a vegetable? the wheelchair
What do you call a person with a hole in their shoe?
A Christian.
Yeetus to the fetus
What did the fat girl say to the donut?
"I'm going to eat you tonight..."
My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"
I said, "Paper."
She said, "Really?"
I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"
You're so fat you're the reason they made tread "meals".
You're so ugly we can't have neighbors.
Whats the worst part about eating a vegetable...
The wheelchair.
What did the balls say to the dick?
Hey dick, how's it hanging?
Why did the monster 🧟♀️ put the cook in a bowl?
He wanted a chef salad. 🥗😂
What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?
Christopher Reeve's horse.
