What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
Worst Jokes Ever
(Note: this joke is not one of the worst jokes ever because it is obscene or offensive; it’s just a bad joke.) Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they’re dead.
Grandma: Most people your age have a family and are married. Why aren’t you?
Grandchild: Most your age are dead. Why aren’t you?
Why do we put round pizzas in square boxes and eat them as triangles?
My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"
Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.
How do you know you’re ugly?
If you always get handed the camera for group photos.
I am an Indian joke.
I found a chest of gold in my garden the other day. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it.
Then I remembered why I was digging in my garden.
What’s the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is plastic and dangerous for children to play with, the other is used for carrying groceries.
What’s the difference between Rosa Parks and Muhammad Ali?
One fought for freedom, the other fought for fun.
Your hairline is running away faster than when your dad went to get milk, and that’s saying something.
Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).
What’s worse than ants in your pants?
Uncles.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liquor cabinet.
What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost two towers.
I loved the Twin Towers, it's a shame my dad didn't.
Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.
There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.
I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.
