Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Monster

  • Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.

    Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.

    There's like a weird after taste though.

    Kinda like a sparkling water one.

    I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.

    River

  • Toto is at school and asks if he can go to the bathroom. The teacher says no.

    Then, she asks Toto, “Where is the biggest river in the world?”

    “Under my bench,” he replies.

  • 0
  • Potato

  • English: It's the story of two potatoes, one gets mashed and the other screams “Oh mash!”

    French: C’est l’histoire de deux pommes de terre. Une d’elles se fait écraser et l’autre s’écrie “Oh purée!”

  • 0
  • Body

  • Me and my stepmom went into the forest.

    I think I hid the body pretty well, but now I have to hide the gun.

  • 0
  • Number

  • So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"

    Phone Number

  • So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.

    Sex

  • Boyfriend: Let's go to bed.

    Girlfriend: No.

    Boyfriend: Why?

    Girlfriend: Because you want sex.

    Boyfriend: No, I don't.

    NEXT MINUTE

    The man could hear banging.

  • 0
  • Sally

  • Why did Sally fall dead?

    Because she was on top of a tower and fell because she had no arms. Hahahahaha!

  • 3
  • Chess

  • Why can Michael Jackson not play chess? Because he can't pick which side he is on, the white or black side.

  • 5