Worst Jokes Ever

What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common?

Once they're gone, they never come back.

What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

What's the difference between kids and drugs? I don't sell drugs.

Teacher, what do you call sex making out with a C.I.W.?

When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.

I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was and pointed to me. I pushed him out of the car, and my other boyfriend took the front seat.

I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.

Jesus and his friend went fishing. They both cast their lines out, and both of them get a bite, but Jesus's friend misses and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's a bad sentence to say; if you say it 3 times, something bad will happen to you." They cast it out again, and both get a bite, and Jesus's friend misses again and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus replied, "If you say that one more time, something bad will happen." They cast out again, and Jesus's friend's line snaps, and he says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's the last time something bad will happen." The biggest thunderstorm ever seen appeared, and a lightning bolt struck Jesus, and a voice came from the clouds, "Damn, I missed."

Doin (DYM 41).

Roses are red, Your mum's a queer, Fucking hell, Can’t get out of first gear!

A man and a boy were walking through a dark forest. The boy said, “I’m scared.” The man said, “Why are you scared? I’m the one who’s going to leave these woods alone.”

Friend: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

Friend: Your life.

Me: Ahhh, I wish!

*jumps off building*

Your mom is fat, oh yeah, oh yeah, uh, uhhh.

Your forehead is so big that teachers use it as a whiteboard.

Your forehead is so big that babies can use it as a full-sized football pitch!

Why can’t an orphan play baseball??

They can’t hit a home run! 😂

Teacher: Where is your slip so I can see you can come on this trip?

Orphan: Parent signature: ___________

When you think about it, Hitler wasn’t a bad person. He killed Hitler.

Hey, can I tell you a pizza joke?

Nah, it's too cheesy.