Worst Jokes Ever
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?
They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"
What is a pedophile's favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Your mama is so ugly even Dora can't explore her.
Your mama is so ugly, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Your mama so ugly she went by a TV and missed eight episodes.
What do you call a one-legged Asian?
Tie Won Shoo.
What does a rifle and a microwave have in common?
They both go "Ping" when they are done.
What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.
Why do orphans cry?
Because they got no family.
What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?
Parents' evening.
What do you call a fucked up mullet? A fullet.
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
Your forehead so big you got to go outside to think.
Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.
Your forehead is so big, if you fell, you would knock out your whole state cold.