Worst Jokes Ever
What zodiac sign has no hair?
Cancer.
What’s a lung’s favorite type of exercise?
Breathing exercises.
I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!
I reached into my pocket and pulled out a rectal thermometer and thought,
"Some asshole has my pen!"
My mom told me to get off the computer or she will slam my head into the keyboard.
I don't think she lskdjfklsdjf.
Why can't LGBTQ+ members be straight? Because they are LGBTQ, they are losers.
If you bully a kid, bully an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile. That's a big word for a six-year-old.
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
Why are blinds called blinds?
Because when they aren’t closed, they are blinding!
What do you call a war dodo named Bob in WW2 and he came from Mars?
Bruno Mars.
My gf dumped me, so I took her wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back?
Happiness is like food, not everyone gets it.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
He thought he saw his parents.
Oasis, am I right?
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.
Me: I'm retarded.
Teacher: Why?
Me: It took me 2 hours to see "60 Minutes."