Worst Jokes Ever

My forehead so big,

big like Biggie Smalls. I love cock, please bum my hole.

Hi.

So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."

Why did an orphan go on Google Maps?

To try and find their parents.

Which way did the cow jump over the moon?

The Milky Way!

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

How do fuck a really fat chick?

Roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.

We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.

I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"

Happy was a cute hippo.

Happy sleeps in the water.

Happy walks on land.

Happy runs on Savannahs.

Happy swims in mud.

Happy takes a bath.

I got caught masturbating in the bath by my mum!

I said, "Mum, I’ll wash it as hard and fast as I want!"

"Jack and Jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town, gave him a frown, and his arms were pricked."

Caesar salad, Jack and Jill, little Johnny Koala,

Zebra, monkey, vegetables, bus, baa, bus.

Wheels on the bus go round and round Round and round round and round Wheels on the bus go round and round All through the town.

Horn on the bus goes beep beep beep Beep beep beep beep beep beep Horn on the bus goes beep beep beep All through the town.

The sheep on the bus goes baa baa baa Baa baa baa baa baa baa The sheep on the bus goes baa baa baa All through the town.

Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?

What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

'Cause they can't find home.

Knock, knock.

Your mom.

If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?

I'm torn on the issue of abortion. I'm pro-abortion because it kills babies, but I'm against abortion because it gives women a choice.

TRUE STORY!

X-Ray Tech: I broke my arm and went to the hospital. The X-Ray Tech was the hottest blonde I've ever seen.

I threw her ass down on the X-Ray table, ripped her clothes off, ripped off mine and I jumped on top of her!

Then I put the X-ray machine on top of us, turned it on and I looked up on the X-ray monitor and I watched and saw my sperm swimming up inside her!