Worst Jokes Ever

America and UK are a joke.

Eastern Europe and Western Europe is a joke.

If Satan is the devil, he's pretty sus.

What makes laissez-faire and a gangbang the same?

Not my problem.

I asked my mother about her mom.

She said she was in a better place. After that, I asked her where that place is. She didn't know, so I sent her to a better place.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding only half a worm.

What do you call a woman with one leg?

Eileen.

My peepee was big, now it's small.

So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.

So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasn’t even Jesus, he’s not doing the T post that he invented.

Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?

Why is the Titanic good at baseball? Because it sinks it.

My friend: You really need to stop the SH jokes.

Me: But they're not that long.

Charger: Yo, Phone.

Phone: Yeah?

Charger: Can I plug all in you?

Phone: Ayooo!

When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

When an orphan takes a selfie, it's a family photo.

My dad has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

Someone in London is stabbed every two minutes. Poor guy.

I got the newest Call of Duty game! I got a 200 kill streak, then I went home and played COD.

So, Helen Keller walks into a bar... And then a table.