Worst Jokes Ever
There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.
My dad died in the attacks. He was the best pilot Pakistan has ever seen, Allahu Akbar!
My dad died in the attacks. He was the best pilot for Pakistan.
I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.
What does an orphan not have in common with criminals?
Criminals are wanted.
What do tomatoes 🍅 learn to do in a race?
Ketchup!
I mess up goats for unicorns?
Jimmy the Unicorn or goat.
I don't even know.
All normal-sized babies are delivered by stork.
Heavier babies are delivered by crane.
I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."
Why could the orphan never be gay?
Because he had nobody to call "daddy."
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
To buy a house.
A good man deserves a queen who will pussy slide on his penis casually, frig him with her thighs like a prostitute, make him laugh like a homie, cook like his mama.
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
You know you're high when you hold all your pineapples hostage and yell, "SpongeBob, I know you're in there!"
My girlfriend broke up with me today. Her mom had to take her to daycare. 😢😢😢
Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wife’s clit.
Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.
It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.
Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.
The woman's body is shaped like a penis. If see a naked female body bent over, her butt looks like testicles, while her head can be seen as the head of a penis.
This is the same if she lies down right side up with her knees up and legs spread. If she lays upside down with her knees up and legs spread, her boobs are like testicles and her pelvic area is like the head of a penis. If you look at the shape of a vagina, it’s shaped like a penis with the lips looking like testicles and the clit looks like the schlong.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.