Two air vents walked into a bar.
The third one ducted.
Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.
When I saw Stephen Hawking for the first time, I knew he had been in a shop!!! I lieeeeeeeeed! 🤣🤣🤣
Mom: Son, where are my condoms?
Son: What are condoms?
Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.
Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?
Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.
Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.
Yo mama so fat, I couldn't see the store.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she looked at the mirror, I cracked up.
Yo mama so ugly Donald Trump said "wrong!"
Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.
These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz."
How do you turn rape into no rape? Steal her bank details for money transfer.
HAIKU JOKE:
Helen Keller could Fuck a blind man so hard that she Ends up with his child.
Helen Keller is the kind of person to ask you what the time is.
Yo mama was so fat, Huggy Wuggy couldn't fit his arms around her!
What wastes your money as you earn it?
Women.
Yo mama's so fat, she's a feminist!
Women say men are trash.
Yet men made the phone, laptops, computer and electrical hardware she uses to say men are trash, never mind the electricity she uses to power those devices...
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.
Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!
Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...
