You know you're high when you hold all your pineapples hostage and yell, "SpongeBob, I know you're in there!"
Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend broke up with me today. Her mom had to take her to daycare. š¢š¢š¢
Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wifeās clit.
Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.
Itās nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.
Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when Iām thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partnerās ding dong.
The woman's body is shaped like a penis. If see a naked female body bent over, her butt looks like testicles, while her head can be seen as the head of a penis.
This is the same if she lies down right side up with her knees up and legs spread. If she lays upside down with her knees up and legs spread, her boobs are like testicles and her pelvic area is like the head of a penis. If you look at the shape of a vagina, itās shaped like a penis with the lips looking like testicles and the clit looks like the schlong.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your pšnis." š„°
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up š.
My wife and Iās gay marriage counselor advised us to watch porn together. So, we decided to try it out one day and search up lesbian shemale porn.
And thatās the day she found out she was a porn star.
Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.
What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?
Something big and warm š.
I got breast implants for my wife to squeeze on as she thrusts on my meat while straddled in between my legs.
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
Why did God create sex for marriage?
Because he wanted more people and less fun.
Emo girls be like: How much am I worth...
Girl, scan the code on your wrist!
My newly wed wife is a porn star. She would probably kill me if she found out.
Hi! It's the kid with another dark joke! On this episode: Orphans!
What do you call a gay Megalodon?
Magalogay.
Her husband prepares them a romantic dinner. The wife tells her husband about her desire for it. The husband was clueless about such acts. So, the wife tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay underneath her naked in the reverse missionary position.
She starts thrusting with his meat inside of her and starts waiting for him to thrust along with her thrusts. However, the husband didnāt know what to do, so he just laid there. Suddenly the wife had an urge to pee, but held it in because her husbandās joystick was right inside her. She loses control after a while and lets one drip out. The wife apologizes profusely and continues thrusting her husband. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another drip of urine run down the husbandās schlong to his pelvis.
The husband throws the wife from the couch, gets up, and says,
"Honey, if you think Iāll be screwed by you for more of that, youāre out of your mind."
Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach
Why canāt orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
