"FUCK IT HURTS SO BAD PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE I CAN'T BREATHE (I am Paul Walker btw)"
Worst Jokes Ever
*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*
What was the orphan's favorite TV show?
Full House.
What was the orphan's favorite cartoon show?
"Fairly OddParents."
Me: Hey, do you want to see my grandma?
Friend: Yeah, sure.
Me: *pulls out gun*
I just got kicked out of the fucking library for putting the women's rights in the fiction section.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.
Why did UK want Northern Ireland for more s***?
Like this post to give someone you hate bad luck.
Why did Russia put war on Ukraine for more nuts?
How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
Me- *crying in the shower*
Also me- *why is my toaster in here?*
Q: What makes depressed kids jump?
A: Bridges.
They call me an elevator because I let people down.
When I get suicidal, everyone worries. I don't know why because that is when I'm the happiest, thinking about death.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!
Yo hairline so bad when people see it, they turn to stone.
Stand in the corner.
Why do black men have nightmares?
Because the only one that had a dream got shot.
