Worst Jokes Ever

Your hairline bent like the relationship with your mom and dad.

What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.

How much you wanna bet you will not repeat my name out loud (at school/work)?

What would an orphan priest call himself?

Father Les.

I once called a group of emos "the suicide squad."

I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.

How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.

There was a kid in a wheelchair. I put him on fire and called him Hot Wheels.

Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)

The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.

The emo tried to high five the tree, but the tree just left him hanging.

I threw a lamp at a depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)

What's the difference between an orphan and a trash bag?

At least the trash bag gets picked.

Why did Michael Jackson like having little boys round him? He was studying for the priesthood.

Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?

It wasn't Islam that radicalized the terrorists who did 9/11.

Jenga comes to mind, though!

McDonald's sweet chili chicken one.

I always use chloroform when stealing a child.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, Here's hoping you do too.