Can a guy in a wheelchair be a stand-up comedian?
Worst Jokes Ever
What pizza did the Twin Towers order? A plane pizza.
What makes sad kids jump? A bridge.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].
Why was 10 scared?
Because he was in-between 9-11.
I was a sit-down comedian, then I tried to stand up. I fell.
I wished I stayed in the wheelchair.
I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and roared, "Hot wheels!"
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
Why can't an orphan see their parents? Because there is mayo in his dick hole.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said, "Man, they are really bad at Jenga!"
Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...
Annabeth: "Percy, whaters up with you?"
Why was 10 scared? Because he was in-between 9/11.
1+1=3
If you don't use a condom.
What do you call a kid in a hot tub?
Vegetable soup.
How do you blindfold an Asian?
With dental floss.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
Once you’ve seen a shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.