Need jokes

This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."

Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.

Gwen, you need to shut up, for once!

Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.

What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?

A KIDNey!

I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!

So, an orphan walked into a store. He gets lost and the store clerk asked, "Do you need help finding your parent?" and the orphan ran out crying.

What does NASA stand for?

Need a star A.S.A.P.!

Why did the music teacher need a ladder to reach the really high notes?

Why can't orphans go to a school field trip?

Because he needs the parent's signature.

I had a new "blonde parts expert" woman call for parts. I needed 2 ought wire for a job. She calls NAPA auto and asks for twat wire. The parts guy was assuming she didn't know about Planned Parenthood? .. 😂🤣

Why was the fart on Kickstarter? He just needed some gas.

What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?

They both have special needs.

I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.

I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"

She said, "She was a little tardy."

I asked her, "I thought they all were."

She’s so therapeutic.

When I need to cure my restlessness, I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your mom's breastestess!

Roses are red, I need a broom, I just shit all over the bathroom.

Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.

All of you idiots who think that it is ok to laugh about us foster kids need to be shot.

Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!

I wish I could follow you, though.

But you need an account so I could follow you, but you don't have one. :'(