Name jokes
Do you know Candice?
Candice dick fit in your mouth!
Look at my name and you'll see the joke (read it out loud).
I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.
Welcome for the rhyme.
What would you name a mummified squirrel?
Perhaps... Mumford?
Poopoo man.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Person one: What did the DJ name his son?
Person two: IDK, what?
Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).
What do you say when a Spanish person loses a car?
Carlos.
I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.
What do you call a soda can’s dad? Pop!
Aaron.
Perrie.
What is the funniest hill in the world called? Hill-arious!
Josh
I guess you can say he xxxpired.
I think we should change Alzheimer’s disease to Joe Biden disease.
One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
I met a man named Jebidiah on Xbox Live.
What's an Asian orphan's surname? No Pham.
My cousin: Brother, I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile; however, I left it as it is].
Me: So tell me about it then.
My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi.
Me: Somebody? Don’t they have, like, the name of you opponents?
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I.
Me: Ok, my bad. Continue.
My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi, and 5 seconds later, I got kill[ed] by Sum_Fing_Wong.
Me: It’s not wrong! In Call of Duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed.
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G.
Me: My bad again. Do continue.
My cousin: I got so angry I blow[ed] up.
Me: So you got blowed up, by what weapon?
My cousin: By the game.
Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]