Name

Name jokes

Middle Name

  • My middle name is Brian. I was so proud of being able to spell my full name till someone pointed out "Johnny Brain Walker" was incorrect.

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  • Virgin

  • Comic: God, you're a fuckin' virgin, aren't you?!

    Gerald: No! I've been 'round the block loads of times; women practically drool over me.

    Comic: Yeah, and the Archbishop of Banterbury, mate. A name like Gerald, and with added 'four eyes' like them shit pair of glasses from FOUR EYED SPECCY INSTITUTION, mate, the only woman your dick has been in was when you were inside your mom's womb.

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  • School

  • In the French school, four sentences must be written. Fritz heard his mother say, "Close the door!"

    Fritz went to his uncle and heard, "Yes, I'll put it there."

    Then he came to his brother who said, "They call me Superman, hahaha!"

    Finally, his sister looked at a photo and said, "Wow!"

    The next day, the teacher said, "Okay, Fritz, it's your turn. Finish eating and take out the trash!" Fritz said, "Close the door!"

    The teacher got angry and said, "I want to see the principal." Fritz replied, "Yes, my friend, I am leaving you."

    The teacher asked, "I have forgotten your name, what is it?" Fritz said, "I'm Superman! I'm Superman! You're nothing!"

    "Who do you think I am?" asked the teacher, who had become very angry. Fritz replied, "Wow!"

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  • Guy

  • Two guys were walking down the street, and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any blond in the world into giving him a blowjob, any blond!

    So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said, "Alright, let's see it!"

    The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, "Hi, my name's Dave, and my doctor just told me that if I didn't get a blowjob from a blond within three hours, the disease I have will kill me in, oh, let's see now, 22 minutes!"

    She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says, "Pull it out!"

    Ten minutes later, the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out!

    So he walks over to her and says, "I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friend's life?!"

    So she looks up at him just crying her eyes out even worse and says, "I could have saved my dad!"

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  • Sister

  • Gina: Maryen? Karlya? Amber? Kristie? Why isn't it listed that she's here?

    Zari: Your sister isn't listed in the meantime, just relax.

    Gina: That still doesn't answer why she's not listed. I want her to see me!

    Zari: Anyway, it will be time for your medications, we have the gixen and the Uiasends.

    Gina: Do you know my sister's name?

    Zari: Yes. Her name is Jalien.

    Gina: Fine, I don't care!!!

    Abortion

  • My pregnant wife said we were gonna name the kid Digiorno. She wouldn't tell me why until she got an abortion and told me, "It's not delivery, it's Digiorno."

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  • People

  • How do Chinese people name their kids?

    They roll a coin down the staircase and it says, "Ching chang chong..."

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