Mythology jokes

Yo mama is so fat she turned the mermaids to fishes.

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip on their broom.

What do you call an underwater maid?

A mermaid! 😂😂😂😂

What does it sound like when a dragon sings? A fire alarm.

A guy walks into a magical forest looking to cut down a tree. The best one he can find is a magical talking tree. He holds his axe up ready to slice and begins to swing when the tree says, "Stop! I'm a magical tree. You can't cut me." "I'm a magical tree!" the man mocks, then as he goes to swing the axe he says, "You may be a magical tree... But you will dialogue!"

What do you call a man who offended an NFL player...

Odin Floyd.

What do you call a titan that can't swim?

TITANic

"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.

What has 8 heads and no legs? A monster.

Neighbor 1: Knock knock.

Neighbor 2: You forgot the 3rd knock.

Odin: .....

You look like a sandwich Bigfoot didn't even like.

I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.

Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.

Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.

I am Thor.

And next year, I will be five.

Why did Saturn have rings?

Because God liked it so he put a ring on it.

What type of alphabet does an elf learn?

The elf-abet.

What do elves study in school?

The elf-abet.

What do you call a flying pig?

Fiction.

Who gave Jesus his birthday presents every year?

Santa Claus!

Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.