My jokes
A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,
"Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."
Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."
Suck my dick!
(Ron Jeremy)
Don't touch my bot.
What is the difference between a human and a magic house to get to a tree and a house to get to the earth to get home 🏡? Day today I have to get my kids and oooooo.
You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.
Repost from my friends account
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It’s like I always tell my kids:
"Two in the pink, one in the stink."
Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?
But that's just my opinion.
Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"
My dick's so big, I stuck it in your mom's loose hole.
Can I put my baaaalls in yo jaaaaws?
If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.
Why does my brother have no mom?
Hey guys, it's Gwen, and I want to say that I'm deleting my account regarding a comment made on my last post :(
"Hey man, what’s your name? Oh, my name is... Do your balls hang low? Can you swing it to and fro? Can you tie it in a knot? Can you tie it in a bow?"
What's long, white, and thick? My dick.
My name is Martha.
We were so poor my dad would give me a penny not to eat supper.
I'd put it under my pillow and while I was sleeping, he would come in and take it. In the morning, he would holler at me for losing the penny.
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.
Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.