My jokes
My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0
This is not a joke; this is just about death...
Dwarfism is a growing problem.
Kidding, that’s not funny. My friend died of dwarfism.
He jumped off a curb stone.
I was digging in a garden once and found a chest full of gold. I wanted to show my wife, but then I thought about why I was digging in the first place.
Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her in on the act and gave away my location from the noise.
My Dearest Friend--C'mon, RickRoll ;)
My sister said that I am a baby, so I said, "Waa, waa."
Why does my girlfriend have a dick? Oh wait, I'm gay.
My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!
"My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104."
Fortnite battle pass, I just shit out my ass. The school: You did what?
Why can't my grandma talk?
Because she's dead.
Never talk about 9/11 to me. I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot ;(
Jesse: Do you like my ball?
Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?
Jesse: No, they do not leave me.
I'm sorry my jokes are so bad.
I either added you because we have shit tons of mutuals, or 'cause I'd let you spit alcohol in my mouth.
I'll let you decide.
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
I tried a lemonade from my friend. It tasted fantatastic!
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.