New My Jokes - Page 67 - Worst Jokes Ever

Are you George Floyd?

Cause you take my breath away! 😮‍💨

Heyo, my children, hope you haven't forgotten about our cult!

My ass itches.

9/11 is like me after I'm finished with my Lego house. I destroy it! 😄🤣

What does Trump stand for?

Trump Runs Underneath My Penis.

I got fired from my job today at a banana factory. They said to throw away the bad ones, so I threw away the bent ones.

I’m a god, and I’m here to flex on you bitches. My flight to New York on September 11th was rocky, but I lived.

Imagine dying on a plane, fr. At least try and respawn:/

Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"

There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.

Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.

What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and kids?

I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

I had sex with my dog once, and my cat hissed at me for not doing her.

This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say, "Open wide for the delicious plane."

What has 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 eyes, 2 breasts for milking, and a hole to fill with my 9 inches?

A sexy female.

My sister: You were born ugly.

Me: I'm not a mirror, sis.

A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”

I put the Christmas balls in my sack.

I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!