Music jokes

Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.

1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.

2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.

4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.

5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!

7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!

8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!

9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!

10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!

Ariana Grande agrees with me on something: women belong in the kitchen and bedroom.

I know this isn't the real chicken wing song, but my version...

"Chicken wing, chicken wing, I want your mommy. Slap her with my hairy salami while she's still yawning."

Make your own chicken wing song and put it in the comments... :)

I named my iPod "Titanic." It's syncing now.

How do we know Stephen is dying in hell?

There’s a stairway to heaven.

What does Michael Jackson say when he stubs his toe?

Ow!

What are Michael Jackson’s sexual pronouns? Hee hee!

Why can’t Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school?

Because he’s dead.

What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?

Hanging out.

I bought a wooden whistle. I tried so hard, but it wouldn't whistle.

So I bought a steel one. It still wouldn't let me whistle. Then I got a lead one. It still wouldn't lead me whistle. Then I realised, they were flutes, so the wood would lead me whistle if I did it correctly. Steel....

Why did the pervert sing "Gucci Gang"?

Because a woman just gave him a lil pump.

A conductor was conducting a song. At the end, he threw his conductor's stick and killed someone. He was put to the electric chair, but nothing happened. They asked why he didn't die, and he replied, "I'm a bad conductor."

The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"

What do you call a rapper who works at the BANK?

Lil Teller.

What is Beethoven doing right now?

Nothing, because he is dead.

There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.

What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.

What do you call a mushroom that makes music?

A decomposer.

They found out that Michael Jackson was transgender, he went from he/him to hee-hee.

I am a reverse rapper because I put bars in my mouth.

I asked Michael Jackson when did he lose his virginity. He just replied with "HEHE!"