Mortality

Mortality Jokes

A friend of mine used to be morbidly obese, but after lots of exercise and hard work... We were able to lift his coffin.

Give a man a match, he'll be warm for hours.

Light the man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Whenever I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.

There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, and it can be quite annoying, making it hard for the patients to sleep, so I unplug them.

Everyone in my class: "I can't wait until I have a family, I can't wait to study for my dream job."

My friends: "What's your dream job?"

Me: "I'm going to die young :))"

What's the difference between a child and a book?

One doesn't scream when you snap its neck.