I banged a German chick one time. I tried anal and asked her to rate the experience. She kept yelling "9! 9! 9!"
Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID. Son (in a happy tone): I know. Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad? Son: Well yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
What’s the difference between a baby and a potato? 140 calories.
In preschool, i confessed my love to my crush, and she rejected me. As heartbroken as i was, i sucked it up and went back to teaching.
What do you call an autistic kid coming to school with a gun ? Special Forces incoming !!
Whats the worst thing to say at a funeral? "Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
whats harder then steel Michel Jackson in an orphanage
throw a few paper airplanes at the twin's in your class see if they fall
People always tell me to say no to drugs, but if i'm talking to drugs, I probably said yes.
What's the difference between a light bulb & a woman ? You can screw & unscrew a light bulb but you can't unscrew a woman
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.
German XP farms: Train carrying chained guys. American XP farms: Walking up to a school with a gun. African XP farms: Cotton field.
A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug" you are letting it slowly die.
I went to kill Biden with poison water and mixed it with my finger and then licked it. I passed out and now I'm here.
What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby.
When you drop them both, everyone screams.
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying "This isn't working". I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine
Today I went to the doctor for a test and he said I have 10 months to live. So later that day I stabbed him to death & the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved
How to you know if your making a caesar salad ? Stabbing it 23 times
One day I went to my friend's apartment and he told me to make myself home. I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors
My asian girlfriend has a wierd name. As I gave her anal, she was yelling "I'm tu yung."