Morbid jokes
I decided to make a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. It's called "Spastics on Elastics."
Today I went to the doctor for a test, and he said I have 10 months to live.
So later that day I stabbed him to death, and the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved!
What did the boy say to the noose?
"Can you please tie me."
I'll always remember my Dad's last words before he died on 9/11... Allahu Akbar!
What do women have on an empty stomach? A miscarriage.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
Jack and Jill went up the hill 'cause Jack took a Viagra.
Jill was drunk, fell to her knee, Jack had his chance, did Jill till 3.
What's the POINT in stabbing people?
HAHAHA
Have you ever said no? Did they keep going?
What do shemales and barns have in common?
Cocks.
What's harder than taking a shit?
Trying to take a shit while constipated!
Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
when the sus.
Shaenaya is single, 16, and looking for a 30 year old man that can pleasure her, huh?
Dick.
I dated a German girl, it was very annoying when she kept on screaming her age and moaning.
Hey, wanna hear a racist joke?
Donald Trump.
I like the iceberg... my favorite character was the iceberg!
What's the difference between a rock and a dead baby?
You can't fuck a rock.
Son: Daddy, why is this red soup so sweet?
Because your mother had diabetes.