Miscellaneous jokes
After all these walkers, you still walk over me.
They said time heals all wounds, well, I broke your watch.
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
Q: What's the best part about gardening?
A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
My sex life.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
My class is my house is quite. I suck a dick, now one cares.
What do terrorists do on 9/11? They have a game of Jenga.
A woman ran into a police station screaming, "Help, I have been graped!" The policeman said, "Do you mean raped?" The woman said, "No, there was a bunch of them!"
Why did Bob Ross die?
Because the paint brush stabbed him.
Shyneyngsngneg sngengenetntwnga giulgekgengjsg genegngmtentwnnwgbgw.
How do you poop?
Did you hear the pickle joke?
It's actually a really big dill.
How do we know the Ancient Egyptians were into organized crime?
They were always using pyramid schemes!
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
Wyatt is a guy who still doesn't have a girlfriend because he didn't sit with Yanely and Jasmine at lunch. Funny joke, huh?
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"