Mind jokes
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!
Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.
What is a dirty minded Harry Potter fan's favorite spell before the deed? Dickus Embigus!
What is a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.
Guys, stop telling orphan jokes, soon they're gonna tell they're par... oh wait, never mind, carry on.
JFK tried meditating. He told everyone he is very open-minded.
We should give whoever killed Hitler a statue. Oh wait, never mind.
I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day, and she said I could be anything I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it, even if it's messy.
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
Sad news, my obese parrot died today.
Mind you, it's a huge weight off my shoulders.
Never mind if I told you, it would go straight through your head.
"Beast Boy Four"
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
If you're born deaf, what language would you think in?
My cousin asked me, "What do you think was going through Hitler's mind right before he died?"
I told him, "Probably a bullet."
I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.
I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.
What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.
Me: Tells a racist joke on the internet and no one bats an eye.
Also me: Tells the same joke at KFC and everybody loses their mind.
What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bomber's mind?
His arse.
I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said, "Never mind."