Mind jokes
What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bomber's mind?
His arse.
Your forehead is so big, you look like Megamind but with no superpower, just a big forehead!
I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said, "Never mind."
What's overcrowded and uncomfortable?
My mind.
Everyone's had a mind-blowing day before, just ask JFK.
Guys, we need to stop telling orphan jokes, they're gonna tell their parents. Oh wait, never mind, continue.
We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.
Yo Father, don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anal plug in there.
What?
The holy water gets all the ass off. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
My friend, you lit my mind: that's what the lighter said to my thighs.
Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 911 victims?
Well, probably their kneecaps.
Yo mama so fat, when she ran... oh wait never mind.
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.
"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it is too cheesy."
"YOU MORON ITS *TOO* not TO, IM GOING TO EAT YOU ALIVE AND RIP OUT YOUR PROSTATE"
Guy: Are you tired?
His “Crush”: No.
Guy: Are you sure, because you’ve been running through my mind all day?
His “Crush”: That’s sweet.
Guy: I’m joking, you don’t look like you do any running.
You've realized I exist? Huh, cool.
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
"Have you driven through Dealey Plaza? It will blow your mind."
~John F. Kennedy
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"
A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"