I once went to the bar for a pint, but the strippers there didn't have that much breast milk.
I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.
The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"
That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.
Is your dad a magician?
Because he magically disappeared.
I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.
Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"
What bees make milk?
Boob bees.
My dad left for milk 4 hours ago, anyone know where he is?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Milk man.
Milkman who?
Milk poooooooooooooooop peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep man!
Your dad left for the milk because of your McDonald's hairline!
Your dad left you because he went for milk.
*1,000,000 years later*
Her: Dad come back!
Him: FBI open up!
Dad: Son, I came back.
Son: Where is the milk?
Dad: Time for another 10 years.
You wonder where my dad is.
Meanwhile, Dad: It's good to be at milk island!
Top five places to find your dad's orphans is Milk Island.
One day, the milkman came to drop off milk.
The boy asked the milkman, "Do you know where my dad is?"
The milkman replies, "I am your dad," then runs off like Batman!
Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?
Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.
Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.
Why do orphans have water in cereal?
Because mom was never around to produce milk.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
My dad never came back with the milk. My mom told me he's in the army.
What does milk and a kid with cancer have in common?
An expiration date.
What do you call diarrhea from a hot woman? Chocolate milk.
What do you call diarrhea from a fat woman? Arsenic.
Milk is that the Uganda way?
