Milk jokes
My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.
I told him my dad never came back with it.
The pastor jumped at the chance to meet Ariana the other day.
He also grabbed, fondled, and fingered. Some might say he was milking the situation.
Why do orphans like milk so much?
Because they got no milk as a baby.
What kind of bees produce milk?
Boobies.
When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.
What did the cow call its own life? An udder mistake.
My dad never came back with the milk. My mom told me he's in the army.
I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"
I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad did not come back with the milk.
What is a milk?
Milk!!!!
My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.
What did the man say to the girl?
You just milked a cow.
I always wanted to go to the store as a kid because I always wanted to look for my dad that went to go get the milk, but I could never find him.
Your hairline is running away faster than when your dad went to get milk, and that’s saying something.
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.
Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
Why does the orphan not buy milk?
That's what their parents are doing.