Orphans always dip their Oreos in water, hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.
It was Christmas time for Little Johnny. He was going to make some cookies and milk for Santa until he heard shaking and moaning from his mother's bedroom.
He thinks, "Meh, Dad's probably back from the grocery store."
But 2 seconds later, he heard a "Ho Ho Ho Oh YEAH!" and then a slap. He opens the door. He finds Santa riding on his 19-year-old mom. He asks, "Santa, when did you get here and WHAT are you doing?"
Santa replied, "Your mother asked for her 'milk jar' to be filled, and that's what I am doing."
Johnny says, "Oh. But, Mom, you told me Dad was here, well where is he?"
(Santa winks at you)
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)
Milk makes you tall, right?
Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?
Why don't orphans drink milk?
'Cause their parents have not came back with it yet.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
Yo mama so stupid, she used a fork to save the milk from the cereal.
How to make emo cakes:
Milk Butter Eggs Sugar We're Going Down Swinging!
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
Why do orphans go to the market?
To get the milk their parents didn't bring back.
My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.
I told him my dad never came back with it.
I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"
Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
I hope your cookie is too big to fit in your glass of milk.
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
School teacher: "Hey kid, why don't you just go home to your family?"
Orphan: "My family never came back for me."
School teacher: "Your daddy must've really needed that milk."
My chocky milk, don't you touch my chocky milk! It's mine! No it's not! It's your face! Ccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
