What’s a hairdresser’s favorite roast? Flat iron roast.
Meat Jokes
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
I like my women the way I like my sandwiches... A little meat between their buns.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
what do you call a cow that fell?
Ground beef.
Your forehead is so big you could roast meat on it.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
I work with animals!
What do you do?
I’m a butcher.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
What do you call meat in an oven?
Africa.
My favorite thing to do in my free time is putting a large skewer on the front of my car and speeding through a school zone trying to make a kebab.
Who was the knight on the Round Table that only ate meat?
Sir Loin.
