Meat jokes
What’s a hairdresser’s favorite roast? Flat iron roast.
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
I like my women the way I like my sandwiches... A little meat between their buns.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
what do you call a cow that fell?
Ground beef.
Your forehead is so big you could roast meat on it.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
I work with animals!
What do you do?
I’m a butcher.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
What do you call meat in an oven?
Africa.
Why do boys feel safer at Ronald McDonald's House than Neverland Ranch?
Ronald McDonald's doesn't put his meat between boys' buns.
My favorite thing to do in my free time is putting a large skewer on the front of my car and speeding through a school zone trying to make a kebab.