McDonald's jokes
Let's play pretend. I'll be Nike and you'll be McDonald's, cuz I'll be doin' it and you'll be lovin' it.
What do priests and McDonald's have in common? They both like putting their meat in between 5-year-old buns.
Your hairline is so bent, the McDonald's logo hairline made fun of it.
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Imagine someone leaving a cut-out of Jeff Bezos on your car after you found out your blind bf cheated on you, and the McDonald's employee says over the speaker, "Weren't expecting him to see other hoes were you?"
If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
Memes
Brass Mcknuckles.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?
They both like sticking their meat in ten-year-olds.
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese.
What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
What did the Alabama graduate say to the Tennessee graduate?
"Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your order please?"
Your hairline is so bad, it's not even McDonald's, it's Dixy Chicken!
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
Your mama so fat that when she went to McDonald's, they said, "Sorry, you've had enough, ma'am."
What’s the difference between the Twin Towers and McDonald's?
McDonald's has a drive through. Twin Towers has a fly through.
Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.
Can emos eat happy meals?
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
My favorite sex position is the McDonald's.
Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it!