Make jokes

Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?

The orca Don-tist.

I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.

Hello, I am School Shooter Memes. For the last month I made School Shooter Jokes on the site, so now I want you guys to vote for the best one. It will be in a quarterfinal format with the 8 of them being the most liked. I will link all of the polls in the comments so make sure to vote for your favourite joke.

I woke up to my daughter riding me in bed. I asked, "What are you doing?" She replied, "Making a Creampie."

Husband: "Honey, I just bought these special Olympic-style condoms!"

Wife: "Olympic-style condoms? What makes them so special?"

Husband: "They come in three colors: gold, silver, and bronze."

Wife: "Ooh, sweet. What color are you going to wear tonight?"

Husband: "Gold, of course!"

Wife: "Why don't you wear silver? It would be nice if you came second for a change."

When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."

A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."

All these jokes make me laugh to death 💀.

How do you make epileptic kids dance?

Throw a flash bang in their room.

Why don't vegetarians moan during sex?

Because they don't want to admit that meat makes them happy.

Three blonde girls are on an island, and they are much too far away from land to swim. They find a genie on the island who offers them each one wish. The first girl says, "I wish I was smart enough to get off this island!" So the genie makes her a redheaded girl, she cuts down a tree, makes it into a boat, and proceeds to row off the island.

The next girl says, "I wish I was even smarter than her so I don't have to do so much manual labor!" So she turns into a brunette and makes a sailboat and lets the wind take her off the island.

The final girl says, "I wish I was smarter than both of them!" So she turns into a man and takes the bridge.

Bosses are like seagulls.

They fly in, make a lot of noise, crap all over everything, then fly out.

Why can't an orphan make a YouTube channel?

'Cause they can't make it family friendly.

Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.

Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.

Make this post have 1000 comments.

What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."

It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.

An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf, and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.

My boss said she would've loved to meet Bill Cosby as a child. I don't get why I'm getting arrested. I was just making sure his dream came true.

My friend told me to make more friends, so I joined a suicide cult.

I’ll be hanging with them for a while.

The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.

Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?

Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"